struggling | 5 foot 2 and shrinking

Hot yoga. I really love it. Like really really. I can step into that heated room, set up my purple mat, the one that has a memory of every pose I’ve ever held and every challenge my body has breathed and persevered through, the mat that has provided a soft place for me to learn how to exist through and with pain until I am able to overcome it, instead of struggling against it. When I relax into my first mountain pose, breathing, breathing, breathing deep, and looking myself in the eyes, I know that I am loving myself, that I am in the right place at the right time, and there is no fear, comparison, or impatience, there is only SPACE inside and outside of me. These are the holy moments of my life now.

Today I finally was able to get to hot yoga and it felt a little bit (and I don’t mean to sound cheesy) like I came home again. Thanks, Des, if you are reading this, for being my yoga inspiration and helping me get there. Friends who pose togetha growz togetha! Having completed my first class, I am looking forward to many more at Moksha Yoga Kelowna. It’s a beautiful, modern and calming studio.

The rest of today flowed gently after my early morning class. When I arrived home, Pinto seemed very upset at the fact that I had left early this morning (at 5:50 am) and had not taken her with me. She is very sensitive and intelligent and really likes to be “included” in most of the human things I do. Seriously. She stands outside the shower while I’m showering, sits at my feet when I play the piano, and has her face nearly on my keyboard right now as I type. We are very attached, her and I.

Anyway, Pinto is not very keen on changes in her routine, or mine for that! When I stepped through the door she nearly tackled me, after which she started sniffing at my yoga bag (yum…sweaty clothes!) and then wolf grumped at me (it’s hard to explain, but it’s kind of like a howl mixed with a whine), giving me a look that communicated something like “WHERE DID YOU GO?! WHY WAS I NOT TOLD?! PLEASE GIVE ME MY BREAKFAST NOW! YOU SMELL LIKE A SOCK!” all at once. It was cute. I told her I went to yoga because I want to get healthier and feel really good, and then she walked over to her food bowl looking as if she had moved on. Dogs. I love em.

On our walk today, I found a pile of very very old and weathered-looking cans that really creeped me out. I also found a neighborhood orchard that has some lingering winter apples on the trees. Beautiful. Here are some pics from today.