weigh-less-ness

As a woman who has been overweight for most of my life (nearly 80 lbs overweight at one point) it has been very interesting to see how my body and mind has adapted to carrying that extra weight and also how it has adapted to  losing it (still in progress).  There are two amazing feelings that I’ve experienced in the process of getting healthy – one is weightlessness and the other is weigh-less-ness. No, that is not a spelling error:

weigh-less-ness

They are different feelings. I’ll share the difference.

Weightlessness is a feeling you can have at ANY WEIGHT. It is a feeling that comes from being in a pure moment of happiness, of true-to-yourself-ness, of joy. I don’t care how overweight you are! You can experience weightlessness and it is a beautiful thing, a marvel of the human spirit. It doesn’t come often, but when it does, it can heal years of damage, and it reminds us of the reality that we all come from perfect and will return to perfect. Our human existence is just a passing moment in eternal time for learning and experiencing; for growing our soul. The mess and beauty and struggle and victory – we get to take it all in.

Weighlessness is different. It is not as profound a feeling as weightlessness, but it is a VERY GOOD feeling, a motivating feeling, a tangible I-am-changing feeling, which don’t come often in life. It is directly related to weight loss. With most situations in life, change is hard to see. It is also hard to feel and hard to accurately measure. In the process of losing weight, however, you experience this amazing phenomena that I have deemed weigh-less-ness, and with it you DO get to feel the changes happening! You can tell when you wake up in the morning and your joints and muscles don’t ache as much. You’re not as stiff. You feel increased vitality and readiness to face your day. You notice that you move faster without trying. You have this craving to put your body into motion. You actually WANT to exercise, and when you do it doesn’t feel as hard. Your clothes are loose. People respond to you differently. You get this revitalized mojo and sexyness without trying. It’s unprecedented most of the time! It just comes naturally.

Today I feel that lovely weigh-less-ness feeling. I woke up early, was happy that I existed, went for a walk with Pinto, started working before 6:00 am, ate a healthy breakfast, took some deep breaths, and felt this deep gratefulness and aliveness saturate me completely like a sponge. And all I want to do now is squeeze myself out and share all of that goodness with world I love and am here to serve. And that, my friends, is what getting, being, and staying healthy is all about – being at your best so you can give your best to the world you were purposefully placed in to fulfill a beautiful destiny. Don’t doubt that for a second.

Dear nihilism, existentialism and misanthropy: 

I don’t have time for you anymore. I’ve outgrown you philosophically.  You like to make people think that buying into your doom and gloom makes them complex and intelligent, and that somehow they’ve arrived at the cold, hard truth and can just give up on caring. Ego-centric. God-less. Hope-less. Throwing the proverbial baby out with the bathwater. But guess what?! That baby survived. It screamed it’s lungs out. It made noise and it was HEARD. It found it’s way into the adopting arms of love, was covered in the warm blanket of beauty, and was nurtured at the healing breast of Mother Earth. It lived to tell the story! LIFE triumphs. It continues. It stays. It is the one constant in the universe. Not the opposite.

I’ve seen rain fall after a drought and things grow again that were all dried up and dying. I’ve seen babies born through pain and struggle and perseverance and the joy that follows.  I’ve seen love actually CHANGE people and situations. I’ve seen miracles happen. The unexplained. I’ve kissed tears from the cheeks of people who thought they would never cry again. I’ve wanted to die, and found my way through the struggle all the way back around to fervently wanting to live and then fervently living!  I’ve seen beauty transcend ugliness time and time and time again. And in the eternal words of Ray Lamontagne “I’ve been to hell and back so many times, well, you kind of bore me.” 

So, yeah. You can just continue to sit alone in a dark room if you want, but the windows and blinds can open and the sun is shining, so if you happen to change your mind, at least you have brighter options.

Sincerely, 

Amber

So, I weighed myself. I am down another few pounds at 151.2. My goal for the end of the summer is 140 lb.

I feel amazing. Even if I didn’t lose another pound in my entire life, I’d be okay with that. 🙂

Today. It’s starting off very well.

 

Ovr’N’Out!

 

Amber

 

 

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